“I's feelin' real down. I's feelin' mighty bad” Sophia, The Color Purple
This sums up how I was feeling Saturday morning, but it was mothers day weekend and It was not all about me. So I threw some things in a bag and took the hour drive to small town USA so see my mother. When I pulled up, she was on the porch with a crazy neighbor, telling the person on the phone, “She just pulled up!” The neighborhood kids were sitting on the curb eating ice cream playing with a turtle they found while fishing. As walked into the house and I kissed my mom, I knew all would be well.
At the beginning of the year, I was on cloud nine. 2008 was behind me and I was feeling good. I was traveling, scraping, up for a promotion just in a really awesome place. Then some negativity seeped in. It was slick. I came on the back of a “friendly gesture” and ‘friendly advice” and within weeks, I was infested. My mind has been racing like a crazy and I’m rethinking my dreams my hopes and my destiny and I don’t like to be questioned. By anyone or anything!
The word "expect" means to look forward to. When a woman is pregnancy it is said she is expecting. Farmers culture a field, place a seed and prepare for harvest. They expect a crop b/c you will reap what you sow .When you place an order, you are expecting it to come.
When I look back on my life, I have expected so much. I expected to get a college education. When I applied for a job, I expected to get it. When I am nice to someone, I expect kindness in return. When Im rude, I expect them to be defendsive. When I was asked a question, I expected him/her to respect my reply. When someone tells me they are going to do something, I expect them or proper notice that they can’t. When I tell a child to stop running/talking, I expect him to. When a guy says, he is interested, I expect him to be a certain way b/c why in the world are you interesting in me and NOT be what I expect you to be[ this is me making fun of me}.
At the beginning of the year, I was on cloud nine. 2008 was behind me and I was feeling good. I was traveling, scraping, up for a promotion just in a really awesome place. Then some negativity seeped in. It was slick. I came on the back of a “friendly gesture” and ‘friendly advice” and within weeks, I was infested. My mind has been racing like a crazy and I’m rethinking my dreams my hopes and my destiny and I don’t like to be questioned. By anyone or anything!
The word "expect" means to look forward to. When a woman is pregnancy it is said she is expecting. Farmers culture a field, place a seed and prepare for harvest. They expect a crop b/c you will reap what you sow .When you place an order, you are expecting it to come.
When I look back on my life, I have expected so much. I expected to get a college education. When I applied for a job, I expected to get it. When I am nice to someone, I expect kindness in return. When Im rude, I expect them to be defendsive. When I was asked a question, I expected him/her to respect my reply. When someone tells me they are going to do something, I expect them or proper notice that they can’t. When I tell a child to stop running/talking, I expect him to. When a guy says, he is interested, I expect him to be a certain way b/c why in the world are you interesting in me and NOT be what I expect you to be[ this is me making fun of me}.
MT2 says, I am super hard on myself and I probably am. Not in that pretentious I want people to look at me kind of way, but more as in I think it is a slap in Gods face when you don’t try to be the best person you can.
But just like when a lady is expecting or a farmer plants his crops, there is a waiting period. When you just have to wait and Be Still. It doesn’t mean I am being lazy, it just means the Martha in me needs to be more like Mary. The bibles says:
But just like when a lady is expecting or a farmer plants his crops, there is a waiting period. When you just have to wait and Be Still. It doesn’t mean I am being lazy, it just means the Martha in me needs to be more like Mary. The bibles says:
10:38 Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home.
10:39 She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to what he was saying.
10:40 But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him
and asked, "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me."
10:41 But the Lord answered her,
"Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things;
10:42 there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her."
To be continued….
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